Loving Her Without Losing Me

How do you love your daughter with everything you have-without disappearing in the process? Leah loves her twenty-year-old daughter, Miri, fiercely. But loving Miri has slowly become the center of the entire family. A delayed text can feel like rejection. A simple disagreement can become proof that nobody cares. The whole house has learned to listen for changes in Miri's voice, to choose words carefully, and to brace for what might come next. And Leah has become very good at keeping everyone together. Too good. When Miri is diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, the diagnosis gives the family a name for some of what they have been living through-but it does not give them an easy answer. Miri is not a diagnosis. She is funny, loving, frightened, deeply sensitive, and hurting. She desperately wants to be loved, even when her fear of losing people pushes them away. Avi, her father, has his own anger to confront. Miri's younger siblings have learned to become quiet when the house becomes too loud. And Leah begins to face a painful truth: Somewhere in the effort to keep everyone else okay, she has almost disappeared. What follows is not a story about a mother giving up on her daughter. It is a story about learning that love and boundaries can exist in the same sentence. That understanding someone's pain does not mean accepting harmful behavior. That saying no is not abandonment. That accountability does not have to mean rejection. >LOVING HER WITHOUT LOSING ME is an emotional family novel about mental health, marriage, motherhood, borderline personality disorder, healing, responsibility, and the complicated work of loving someone without losing yourself. For every parent who has wondered where helping ends and rescuing begins. For every family member who has learned to walk on eggshells. >Because sometimes healing does not begin when the pain disappears. Sometimes it begins when a family learns a different way to love.