the Girls We Miss: Autism, Overwhelm, and Cost of Late Diagnosis

There is a version of autism people expect to see. Loud. Visible. Disruptive. But what happens when it isn't? What happens when someone learns to adapt instead of interrupt, to mask instead of collapse, to survive quietly enough that no one recognizes the struggle beneath the surface? In The Girls We Miss, Jessica Lauren Racicot shares a deeply personal exploration of autism, overwhelm, delayed recognition, and the devastating cost of being misunderstood. Drawing from lived experience, she examines why autistic girls and women are so often overlooked-not because the signs are absent, but because they do not match the expectations systems were built around. What begins as a reflection on missed signs and internalized struggle becomes a powerful examination of: - Masking and camouflaging autistic traits - Sensory overload and delayed processing - The emotional cost of late diagnosis - Systemic misunderstandings of autism in girls and women - Parenting, crisis, grief, and self-discovery At the center of the story is a life-changing moment involving her son-a moment that reshaped how she understood autism, herself, and the invisible struggles many people carry. Honest, reflective, and deeply human, The Girls We Miss challenges readers to look beyond behavior and ask deeper questions about what people may be experiencing beneath the surface. Because understanding should come before crisis. Not after.