WITH ALL DUE RESPECT, MY BELOVED!: 800 EVERYDAY PHRASES IN GLORIOUSLY OVER-THE-TOP MEDIEVAL SPEECH

Love is wonderful. Living together is... a little more complicated."What's wrong?" - "Nothing." "Where's the remote?" "What do you want to eat?" "Do whatever you want."Every relationship has its great romances, tiny negotiations, mysterious missing socks, sofa disputes, unread messages, stolen blankets - and those perfectly innocent sentences that somehow turn into full-scale diplomatic incidents.With All Due Respect, My Beloved! transforms the everyday madness of couple life into gloriously over-the-top medieval speech.Suddenly, a simple disagreement becomes a border conflict between two noble realms. An apology becomes a formal petition for peace. The remote control becomes the scepter of moving pictures. And "Come to bed" acquires the dignity of a royal decree.Inside you'll find 800 hilariously courtly phrases for the moments couples know all too well: - dating, flirting and first sparks- texts, emojis and digital misunderstandings- compliments, romance and declarations of love- moving in together and sharing a home- socks, laundry and household chaos- food debates and the eternal question: What should we eat?- TV, sofas, sleep, blankets and snoring- shopping, money and mysterious packages- arguments, apologies and making peace- jealousy, family, friends and awkward moments- vacations, driving and backseat commentary- work, anniversaries, intimacy and long-term loveWhether you're newly in love, engaged, married, or have been ruling the same household for what feels like several dynasties, one truth remains: Love may be timeless. Relationship chaos certainly is.This is not a relationship advice book. It will not solve your arguments, locate the missing remote, or stop anyone from stealing the blanket.But it may make all of it considerably funnier. The book is intentionally exaggerated and designed for laughing, reading aloud, sharing and lovingly teasing your partner.A perfect gift for couples, husbands, wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, fiancés, newlyweds, anniversaries, Valentine's Day, weddings, Christmas - or anyone who has ever loved someone enough to be royally annoyed by them.Because if you're going to drive each other crazy, you may as well do it like royalty.