Woke Richard's Almanack

In these divisive times, here comes a two-in-one satire of the right and the left in the form of poetic aphorisms à la "Poor Richard's Almanack." With the misguided ambition of creating some humility through self-deprecation, but who are we kidding there will probably just be outrage. That counts as cope though, right? Rage cope?!? At any rate, you're bound to laugh out loud at one half or the other so why not give it a try!